I’m awful at keeping secrets — like, incredibly bad at it. I just don’t know how not to be an open book which is why I have a hard time blogging when I have things I need to keep on the down low for whatever reason.
Well, it’s time to come clean.
I so need to unload.
A good old brain dump if you will.
This ones gonna be a doozy.
OMG, I don’t even know where to start!
First, let’s talk about this photo.
That was the drawing my doctor used to explain the full hysterectomy I will be having done next month.
Oh, how that sounds weird to say out loud still.
But it’s happening. They’re taking my uterus, fallopian tubes, and cervix. At first, my doctor went through a few options with me, but once she saw the sonogram, she changed her tune. My ovaries are staying unless they notice anything out of whack when they get in there. So that’s good. Apparently, when they do remove your ovaries it’s called an Oophorectomy — ya learn something every day!
So, I don’t know how I feel about this. On the one hand, I’m relieved to know I’m not crazy. The back pain, cramping and increasingly more intense periods are not in my head. Those circles the doctor drew on the diagram represent my fibroids. The large one has grown pretty significantly over the past two years which coincides with when I started noticing my symptoms.
On the other hand, I’m nervous as hell. Surgery is never fun — the recovery time, the potential for complications and being totally honest here, life without a uterus! What in the heck is that going to be like?!
I guess there’s never good timing when it comes to medical things but this procedure is also happening right smack dab in the middle of a job change for me.
This new job was the other keep-on-the-down-low things that’s been holding me back from blogging. I haven’t been happy with my current position for a multitude of reasons. The most important one being the actual work. Being a Marketing Manager sounded great on paper, but in all honesty, it’s just not my cup of tea. I need a more technical position. One where I can solve problems, develop and be creative.
Well, I think I found the job of my dreams!
Today I officially accepted an Instructional Technology (what I have my masters degree in BTW) with the Peabody Institute, a prestigious conservatory, and university in the Mount Vernon area of Baltimore.
Here I am in their amazing library while waiting for my interview last week.
I was so impressed by the campus, the team and the job, I left inspired. I followed up immediately and then again a few days later. I was trying not to be too aggressive, but after talking to a few people who know the school and know me, they all agreed — it’s a perfect fit.
This week I was carrying the stress of letting my current employer know I was leaving. I knew it was the right thing to do for me, but that doesn’t console my inner-pleaser who hates to let people down.
I’ve been stressed for a couple of weeks now with all these balls in the air, but as of today, I have the last day date at my current job, a surgery date, and a start day for my job. All this makes me very happy and relieved even though I’m still nervous about, ya know, losing my uterus and all.
The next two months are going to quite a roller coaster ride. I’m already stress-eating. My morning workouts have helped me stay somewhat sane, and I’ve been having fun with the new strength program we’re following. That said, I’m distraught over the recovery time of this surgery. I’m looking at six weeks at least.! I haven’t taken that kind of time off from the gym in years!
I forsee a lot of walking in my future. 🙂
In other news…
- I fixed that pesky spam issue with a new plug-in so comments SHOULD post correctly now. Sorry about that.
- My bowling league started back up! I have a whole new team. This is the third year I’m in a league, and I must say, I love it!
- I started a family running streak. This needs its own post it’s so awesome! I’ve been sharing updates on my Facebook Page I’ll post more about it next week.
- The kids have started school, and we took our annual photos again. I shall leave you with these so you can nod in disbelief like am.
More soon now that I’ve gotten all that off my chest!